Being a Friend Like Jesus

Being a Friend Like Jesus
John 15:9-17

Introduction: Next Sunday is Friend Day and our annual picnic so I hope you are planning to invite someone to join us that Sunday. Friendship is a glorious thing. It is something that brings sweetness to life that we all want more of. I especially treasure friendship that I made in Kenya with both my American and Kenyan brothers. Part of it grew out of the common goals we had there as well as sharing the victories and adversity of that time. I think there is that sense of friendship found in today’s passage. It tells us something of what it means to be Jesus’ friend but also it tells us something of how Jesus wants us to be friends.

I. Acceptance
These words of Jesus were spoken at the end of his ministry with and to his disciples. Jesus used the word ‘friend’ in casual ways but this time it is different. It is after three years of his constant presence and the hardships of ministry that Jesus calls them friends. How did Jesus form these friendships?

The first step in friendship is acceptance. One of the outstanding things about Jesus was his ability to accept people where they were. This was certainly true of the disciples. They were men of various backgrounds, learning, abilities and prejudices. Jesus was constantly calling people to follow him and yet there were other callings and levels to the relationship Jesus had with people. At one point in his ministry Jesus went out and prayed all night before choosing twelve men to be in a special relationship with him. Why these twelve? Anything we say is speculation but they were men Jesus could teach and would accept his teaching. But more than that, I think Jesus chose them because they would be his friends.

Of course Jesus accepted more than just these few men. Jesus accepted the unacceptable, at least unacceptable to the standards of the day. Many churches might not accept such people today. Jesus accepted prostitutes, the greedy; he even ate with religious people. He accepted people with socially isolating diseases. It was this acceptance that marked the early church. It shaped the church’s evangelism to the point where slaves and women found such acceptance. The early church was criticized and scorned for its acceptance of such people. Paul put in it this way; “Accept one another, then, just as Christ accepted you, in order to bring praise to God.” (Romans 15:7) To be a friend like Jesus is to accept others no matter what. Our human tendency is to reject those we don’t approve of; those not like us, or those that don’t agree with us. It is interesting that such a heart of acceptance of others will lead some people to exclude us. Why did some accept Jesus and others reject him? Why did some follow and some walk away in sadness? There is a price to be paid for friendship, especially friendship with God.

II. Expectation
While Jesus accepted people where they were, he also has expectations if people were to walk with him, if they were to become his friends. Jesus put it plainly; “You are my friends if you do what I command.” (John 15:14) That at first glance seems an extreme condition for friendship. Yet every friendship has expectations and commitments. My closest friendship is with Diane and there are mutual expectations and commitments that are very exclusive to that relationship. This may be another factor in the decline of close friendships in the United States, the fear of commitment. Friendship demands time. We commit to honesty with each other. It means doing things together. The depth of the friendship is measured in the depth of commitment to these things.

Who were these men whom Jesus called friends? They were the ones who went with Jesus to the next town when they could have stayed at home. They were the ones who went into dangerous unfriendly places like Samaria when Jesus said, “I’m going there.” They stayed with him when others got angry with Jesus and walked away. They were the ones who committed to doing what Jesus taught and Jesus called them his friends.

We are here today as friends because our main desire is to be Jesus’ friend. Would Diane and I be here among you this morning without our friendship to Jesus? It is unlikely that we would have ever come to Livonia let alone met or become friends with any of you. That is probably true for all of us. That is why Jesus’ command makes sense, “This is my command: Love each other.” (John 15:17) Jesus wants all of his friends, those who love him and keep his commands to love all those who have made the same commitment to Jesus’ friendship. As we consider what that means to our invitation to those we invite to our church this means we want them to meet the one who is the reason for our being here, Jesus the Son of God. The Livonia church has a lot to offer people but it is this relationship, this commitment that is primary.

III. Friend of God
We become like our friends. It is natural that we do that. We become like people we admire and are with on a consistent basis. That is why being a friend of God is such an incredible invitation, opportunity, and responsibility. It was that way for Abraham who is referred in scripture as “friend of God”. Now we are invited to be friends of Jesus, friends of God.
Do you ever become jealous of your friends especially if you have a close friendship? I suppose this is a natural reaction because we have such a limited capacity for relationships. But God is not that way. The infinite God has an infinite capacity for friendship and he has invited each one us to be his friend. How close a friend we become depends to a certain extent on our love for him and our obedience to him.

That is why we invite people to join us, a fellowship of Jesus’ friends. Being a friend like Jesus means we learn to accept others as he did. It means we call people to follow Jesus, to walk a different direction from where they have been going. Following Jesus is an adventure that can lead you to places you never dreamed of being. If you don’t think this is true then talk to Paula, Jill, and Karen about their trip to Nigeria. Talk to Diane and me about Kenya or about coming back to Livonia. Jesus is willing to become as close a friend, as we will allow him to become.
Being a friend like Jesus means loving like Jesus also. That means loving people into the image of God and not anything less. It means loving to point of laying ourselves out on behalf of our friends. Being a friend is not some light commitment but a willingness to give everything for our friend Jesus, and all of Jesus friends.

If you are not Jesus friend why don’t you join us in the adventure of a lifetime, of an eternity.


Livonia Church of Christ: September 3, 2006